The Lack of Methodology


Blessed Epiphany to you all!

Sorry, faithful reader(s?), I meant to post yesterday, however, time, laziness, and general forgetfulness got in the way. I’ve been trying to stay consistent so that if this blogging thing turns into something, it won’t catch me by surprise.

Anyway, I have a variety of topics to discuss, yet, this segment is devoted totally to one thing: my general annoyance with texting and the implementation of it in current meeting/dating methodology.

When texting first came to my attention 6-ish years ago, I thought it was atrocious. It wasn’t until visiting a friend in NYC that she mentioned it was a great way to let someone know what practice room you were in without a phone conversation in a building with bad reception. (She was getting her masters in piano at Julliard at the time.) Okay, point taken.

Over the coming years, texting has presented more problems to me than solutions. As a classroom teacher desiring to uphold the “no cell phone usage” policy, I ignited a HUGE bomb with some 8th graders over a cell phone present in my class. I thought texting and driving might be okay until I realized how much I wasn’t paying attention to the road. And of course the cell phone and electronic devices of all sorts are the bane of any concert player or goer. Add to that text notifications and the backlight from screens – you have grumpiness all over the concert hall!

While text messages have their place and use, I feel my experience with them has a pretty big damper. With my last phone upgrade, I got the horizontal slide phone that opens to a QWERTY keyboard as I was beginning to text more. This way, I could “type” faster to the people who were texting me more. Then the beginning buds of a relationship were showing. And the guy chose texting as his main mode of communication, which I wasn’t happy with. But I thought, “We’re long distance with whacky work schedules. We’ll figure something out.” So, I (stupidly) allowed it, and secretly hated how surface-level we were keeping the “relationship.” Until one night when we were texting, and I was suddenly the recipient of a message that not only had absolutely nothing to do with our conversation but was morbidly obscene.

This started my dispassion.

14 months later, I went on my next date. This guy broke the ice with texting, but we quickly moved to phone/Skype conversations. Okay, works for me. But then a week or so later, he still prefers texting me. By this point, I was fairly unimpressed due to other ways he was treating me, but I felt that saying, “I get annoyed with texting” should have been a direct enough hint. Seriously, if any male is still reading please let me know: should I have expected to tell him at least 3 times that texting annoys me? Oh well. No major losses were cut.

Currently, I’m chatting with a fellow. And yet again, there are more texts going around. I will give this one props: he’s out of talk minutes and has unlimited texts – so, he at least warned me.

I have a feeling this is a “if you can’t beat ’em, join ’em” situation.

While I like how short messages can be playful and break the ice for potential suitors, I come to a point rather quickly where I tire of banter and want to see how I connect with a person. A real connection. One where I share the “terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day” stuff, along with the mundane and the exciting. Where I’m challenged and asked to dream. I can’t do that in 140-160 characters.  And while I know guys aren’t always into the talking thing, that’s part of who I am. I’ve tried being less than myself before – it doesn’t work.

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3 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Trackback: Texting fatigue | Datingwise
  2. Cathi Willms aka "Mom"
    Jan 05, 2012 @ 19:25:54

    Isn’t it ironic that we live in the Information Age and we all probably know less about one another than in the days of limited phone contact and snail mail.?

    Reply

  3. Anna
    Jan 05, 2012 @ 15:56:52

    Yeah, texting to establish a relationship is stupid. If a guy asks you something over text that you would rather discuss over phone or in person, you could just say something like, “I’d love to tell you more about X but I’m afraid that texting it would would give me thumb fatigue.” He’ll get the hint.

    Reply

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